John Kerry Job Application

JOB APPLICATION NAME: John Kerry RESIDENCE: 7 mansions, including one in Washington DC, worth multi-millions. I served in Vietnam (four months). EXPERIENCE: Law Enforcement. In my career as a U.S. Senator, I've voted to cut every law enforcement, CIA, and Defense bill. I ordered the city of Boston to remove a fire hydrant in front of my mansion, thereby endangering my neighbors in the event of fire. I served in Vietnam (four months). MILITARY: I served in Vietnam (four months). I used three minor injuries to get an early discharge from the military and service in Vietnam (as documented by the attending doctor). I served in Vietnam (four months). I then returned to the U.S., joined Jane Fonda in protesting the war, and insulted returning Vietnam vets, claiming they committed atrocities and were baby killers. I served in Vietnam (four months). I threw my medals, ribbons, or something away in protest. Or did I? My book "Vietnam Veterans Against the War: The New Soldier", shows how I truly feel about the military. I served in Vietnam (four months). COLLEGE: I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. Unlike my counterpart George Bush, I have no higher education and did not get admitted to Harvard nor graduate with an M.B.A PAST WORK EXPERIENCE: After College and Vietnam, I ran for the U.S. Congress and have been there ever since. I have no real world experience except marrying very rich women and running their companies vicariously through them. I served in Vietnam (four months). ACCOMPLISHMENTS: As a U.S. Senator I set the record for the most liberal voting record, exceeding even Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton. I have consistently failed to support our military and CIA by voting against their budgets, thus gutting our country's ability to defend itself. Although I voted for the Iraq War, now I am against it and refuse to admit that I voted for it. I voted for every liberal piece of legislation. I have no plan to help this country but I intend to raise taxes significantly if I am elected. I served in Vietnam (four months). My wealth so far exceeds that of my counterpart, George Bush, that he will never catch up. I make little or no charitable contributions and have never agreed to pay any voluntary excess taxes in Massachusetts, despite family wealth in excess of $ 700 million. I served in Vietnam (four months). I (we) own 28 manufacturing plants (Heinz) outside of the U.S. in places like Asia, Mexico and Europe. We can make more profit from the cheaper cost of labor in those Countries, although I blame George Bush for sending all of the other jobs out of Country. I served in Vietnam (four months). Although I claim to be in favor of alternative energy sources, Ted Kennedy and I oppose windmills off Nantucket and Martha's Vineyard as it might spoil our view of the ocean as we cruise on our yachts. I served in Vietnam (four months). RECORDS AND REFERENCES: None. However, I served in Vietnam (four months). PERSONAL: I practice my Catholic faith whenever cameras are present. I ride a Serotta Bike. I love to ski/snowboard. I call my Gulfstream V Jet the "Flying Squirrel". I call my $850,000 42-foot Hinckley twin diesel yacht the "Scarmouche". I am fascinated by rap and hip-hop and feel it reflects our real culture. I own several "Large" SUVs including one parked at my Nantucket summer mansion, though I am against large, polluting, inefficient vehicles and blame George Bush for our energy problems. I served in Vietnam (four months). PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004.

Poem to a friend: Snipers Regret

Snipers Regret

I wonder in the night time

I wonder who will hear

I wonder if they know........ How close, I am near

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Do they have a family?

Do I give a fuck?

They will only live............. If they fucking duck!!!!

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The first one did not duck, The other looks my way. I crank another round home And send him on his way.

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It's baggage and I know it. Man, it really sucks. If only I'd not been thereand......... If he'd only DUCKED! Semper Fi

Patrick Johannesen USMC My 'ole buddy Herb

God what a view...breath taking

Well I've been browsing the web as we all do and did a search for and old username I used to use and found an old webpage I helped a buddy build qute a few years ago. I am shocked that it's still in tact and Yahoo hasn't removed it from their server. I am sme what glad they haven't because I haven't seen these pictures in years. If you've ever lost a friend, I mean a really good friend and then one day something happened and there's no way to recover that friendship it's rather heartbreaking. Yeah the sun still comes up in the morning and sets in the evening. But there's an emptiness in your soul and that void can never be replaced. We were good friends. Yeah we had our moments where shit wasn't right but nothing that couldn't get worked out. Then, then....I don't know what happened. Change I guess. Call it divorce, mid life crisis, I don't know out of frustration I suppose I decided to distance myself from my best friend and I suppose he decided to do the same. We worked together, I dangerous job where you need to know the other guy has your back and you can trust that guy. I had that trust in him. We served together, USMC 88-92 he was a great leader and I'm sure he still is. He had the potential here but wasted it it on hate. While there is so much to hate with the people I work with I never did sweat the shit that got to him. I guess this is my way of saying I'm sorry. Whatever it was or whatever I did. Honestly I was glad to see him go but at the same time resented him for leaving me behind. You knw the old addage "Never leave a man behind". We were better than this and we let petty shit come between us. Personally I'm ashamed of it and honestly you should be too! It's too late for all that because you're gone and doing your own thing now, have a new wife and baby. And things with the new job sound really great. I hope the best for you. Good luck and stay safe brother, you'll always be my friend

Back in Business: Gun Industry Plans for the Expiration of the Federal Assault Weapons Ban

This resource was forwarded to you from Join Together Online by bmccall@mail.manti.com. http://www.jointogether.org/z/0,2522,574762,00.html -------------------------------------------------------------------- Back in Business: Gun Industry Plans for the Expiration of the Federal Assault Weapons Ban With the experation of the assault weapons ban, some have argued that it will have significant consequences for public safety. The Consumer Federation of America (CFA) sought answers to questions surrounding the expiration of the assault weapons ban from an unconventional source: the gun industry itself. CFA found that, while many things won't change as a result of the assault weapons ban expiring, there will be some potentially significant ramifications. http://www.consumerfed.org/BACK_IN_BUSINESS.pdf Publication date: September 2004 Source: Consumer Federation of America Foundation 1424 16th Street, NW, Suite 604 Washington, DC 20036 Phone 202-387-6121 Fax 202-265-7989 -------------------------------------------------------------------- (Mail ID: 305266)

St. George Marathon 10/2/2004

Well, I did it! Hooray! I have completed all the Marathon scheduled in Utah for 2004. I'm feeling preety good about the whole thing. The race was fantastic. This is my first year marathoning and what a great experience it's been. The St. George was a wonderful race with a lot of great prople spectating and rooting for their runner. The race itself was fast, mostly downhill with a kickass uphill 7% grade at mile 8 but I kicked it's ass. I would have like to get a sub 4 hour run but with all the knee problems I have been experienceing I feel my time of 4:07:23 will do for now, being it's my first year. I have learned a lot and hopefull can translate all that I've learned int becoming a better runner for the future. Thanks to all the folks who were there rooting and cheering it really makes a difference. I will post a picture a soon as I get them off my camera. Close to 5000 runners showed up to participate and what an event for me. This was my first St. George Marathon and hopefully it won't be the last.

http://stgeorgemarathon.com

It's Been awhile...again

Well, it has been a couple of weeks since I've posted anything. I don't know why? I should really keep this blog up to date. Could be because I'm busy or just too damn lazy. Either way I'll update it when I'm damn good and ready. As you can see by the photo I have completed another successful Marathon. It's was on the 24th of July and what a bitch. All downhill with some uphill wind in your face for some of the time. I was a sore sumbitch after this baby. More sore than the 4 previous. I'm over the soreness and ready and training for the next one Sept. 18th and stoked to do it. They're tough but I get through them. It's not the worst thing in the world, I just think about those Ultra Marathoners. Now what a bunch of tough bastards, running 50k's 100k's and 100 milers. Shit man! I'll do it one of these days just got to get a few more marathons under my belt. For now 26.2 is where i'm at and happy to be here. Personal congrats to Lance Armstrong for kick'n ass on the world and taking his 6th Tour de France. He is definitely positive motivation for any endurance sport. Way to go Lance. I will rant later, I won't ruin this post with other BS. 2004 Deseret News Marathon Finish

And here they are all grown up...well kinda. And Champs of the 2004 UGSA Softball Tournament. Way to go girls!! 

Lyons Tournament Champs 2002 and Oh! Look at them go now! I'm Proud of you girls! 

Marathon #3

Well I successfully completed Marathon #3 Saturday. It was quite an adventure. With a weather forcast of 30% chance of T-storms we didn't get so lucky. It was hail and brimstone. It started raining at about mile 3 and didn't let up until mile 18 or 19. It rained and hailed with lighning and thunder and was miserably cold. It was definitely a challenge for all 800 runners who dared run. It was a feat only the strong would survive. And near as I could tell the whole lot of marathoner's who should survived. Now I'm fairly new to the sport of marathoning, these people are a different breed of folks, for sure. For someone to want to runf 26.2 miles in just about any condidtion is insane but these people sign up time and time again to run and endure the self inflicted physical torture one must endure to cross the finish line. But in the end, what a feeling of accomplishment. My calves and thighs burn by mile 20 so one must dig deep inside to find the personal fortitude to cross that line. It's a most gratifying feeling when you cross with all the spectators, family members there to cheer and greet the pain staked runner's. So since January I've completed 3 marathon's and plan to complete at least 4 or 5 more before the end of this year. I know, it's friggin nuts but it's great even the risidual muscle soreness the few days after. But you saddle back up and prepare for the next one. I made a PR (personal record) during this run considering the weather lowering my time to 3:56:15.5, beating my Salt Lake Marathon time by seven minutes. You say only seven minutes, well in those last seven minutes a lot of things could happen. So, I'll take the sub 4 hour time and run with it, so to speak. Now the goal is to lower it again and again eventually gettiing time for the a qualifying time for the Boston Marathon somewhere in the neighborhood for 3:20:00. We'll see. Baby steps. One race at a time. So here's the plan. June is I've scheduled the Park City marathon, July the Deseret News, August On Top Of Utah Marathon, then we'll see for the rest of the year due to no more races being available in Utah to run. So we'll have to look out of state to compete or take a stab at Ultra-Marathoning which is an entirely different breed. These people run 50K to 50 miles to 100 milers. Yeah they are really crazy but more on that after I do my first. I haven't yet scheduled one but I may get one in before the end of the year. It's great fun for the family. This particular marathon offered a 1 mile run for kids. My 10 year old has been wanting to run ever since she knew 'Dad' was running. So we enrolled her in and she did great. I was so proud she finished and she was proud she finished. She placed 25th or so in the race and got a finishers medal to boot. Kudos to the reace organizers getting the kids involved in this run. It was fun had by all I;m sure. I think she'll stay with it and her next goal is to run a 5K (3.1) miles. I think it's great, this day and age to get them involved. I suppose there's worse things kids these days are in to. So more later from this realm of mine.... OUT 1/*

I made it through another one...

Well another six day rotation has gone by and still here to blog on. Again dealing with simple problems of people who rely on 'the system' rather than simple problem solving. I don't know what it's going to take for people to pull their heads out of their asses and deal with their own problems. Put we're here to protect and serve, even if that means the neighbors dog is barking and keeping them awake at night. Instead of being neighborly and asking them to take care of the fucking dog. But that would cause problems and they report it because 'we' are supposed to be the 'bad guys' and it's alright if we show up with an anonymous complaint and cite the neighbor for his barking dog, then it's okay. So the neighbor gets pissed off because at the whole neighborhood because he wants to know who called anonymously. It's a joke, and that's only one simple example. What the hell is the world coming to? Gas is a fucking joke, Milk is a fucking joke, porn stars with AIDS, ice cream is too cold, and water is too wet. Fuck! Wahhhhhhh! Hey listen up! Pull your socks up to your knees and get down to business! Geez, quit complaining there's nothing we can do about it! The people running shit are going to do whatever the hell they want. Why? Because they can and will try and run every aspect of our lives. It's not really a free country anymore, we're close to a socialist nation with free handout and medical care, welfare, etc. etc. So we try and get by finding those simple things in life that we find to enjoy. Personally I find a good book and a nice bottle of wine to be as fine an escape as a meth addict finds their next syringe filled with battery acid. But doper's is another rant for later. So deal with it! Talk to your neighbors if you have a problem! Don't call the authorities. Get a job and get off welfare, and shot shooting that shit in your veins it ain't going to do you any good! I know I'm an over opinionated asshole. So. This is my blog and I'll write what I feel! More later.....OUT 1/*

Leadership

Here are some leadership traits I found while searching. I believe them to be of some value. Considering the lack of them in my current situation. Read through them I hope they're enlightening. I specifically call your attention to #7. Because today I was struck with this particular one while at some training. A class role was being handed around and when it came to me to sign I noticed the Sheriff's name on the class role signed in his Sargeant's handwriting. Well the Sheriff failed to attend the training. Again later another role was handed around for the instructor. Again the Sheriff's name was on the role but this time his Capatain signed hi name for him because the Sargeant had left for one reason or another. I am clearly disgusted by this. I believe is show a complete abuse of power and by no means does it positively exemplify the position of these men. It is disheartening to think these are the men making the Law Enforcement decision for this county Well enjoy the read.... Nine Leadership Traits 1. "Charisma: Creates trust and instills confidence in people, and has a talent for conveying a sense of mission. 2. Consideration for others: Listens actively to others and pays attention to them; offers advice and coaching to people who need it, especially newcomers. 3. Intellectually challenging: Rethinks old problems in new ways, and helps others do the same. Encourages people around him to think logically and use evidence instead of offering opinion with nothing to back it up. 4. Courage: Willing to stand up for ideas, people, and what's right regardless of the risk or consequences. 5. Reliable: Keeps promises and commitments, and accepts responsibility for his or her actions and mistakes. Also, the ability to work dependably without the constant supervision of a boss. 6. Adaptability: Able to change according to the situation and handle more than one question or problem at a time. 7. Integrity: Committed to doing what's ethically right. Sets a positive example for others and doesn't abuse the privileges of power. 8. Judgment: Has the ability to make good decisions based on facts, experience, and realistic assessment of situations. Takes the opinions and experiences of other people into account. 9. Respect: Treats everyone with the same consideration, regardless of their rank or position in the organization More leadership later....OUT 1/*

Intro

Well, I've been thinking of doing a BLOG for some time now. I suppose to vent some of my daily frustrations with 'my' life and those happenings that are totally out of my control (at least for now). So, keeping in mind my frustrations and cynical attitude because of the profession i'm currently employed the use of foul and abusive language may be used. I'f you're offended in any way. I really don't give a shit! Get off my blog. You don't have to read it! However, it should enlighten all those who may find this space in the endless quagmire we call cyberspace. If y'all decide to comment, feel free. I'd like to hear what you have to say. Anyways, welcome to my world and all the shit I have to deal with. I'm sure your lives are very similar from day to day. So sit back and enjoy the ride. I know I do!